Day 209 - Relentless

Here are a few words from my book that have stood out to me today.  Highlighted in pink.

"It's good for God's people to be put in a place of longing so they feel a slight desperation.  Only then can we be empty enough and open enough to discover the holiness we were made for."

2 Cor. 7:1 Therefore, since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.

"We were created to be God's representatives as we live out loud the message of God in our daily lives.  But I'll be honest, the last thing I feel like doing when I'm living in a defeated state with my food issues is to reach out to other people. I want to cry.  I want to withdraw. I want to be jealous that others don't have my issues.  I want to be mad at God for giving me this metabolism.  I want victory but I feel so weak."

Satan knows that if he can defeat you in your mind, he can defeat you in your experience. ~ Joyce Meyer

I can totally relate to the "feeling empty" part....maybe I'm about to make a discovery, because God has not let up on me from the moment my feet hit the floor this morning.  From crying in Sunday School, and in church, to a friend bringing me a cd to listen to, to a lady speaking out in the prayer and praise service tonight - (something that hit home), to reading my devo, to Joyce Meyer posting on Facebook....IT HASN'T STOPPED! He's been relentless. And I'm EXACTLY where Lysa is describing she was....defeated, withdrawn, jealous, and angry.  Yep, that sums it up - but this has all began in my mind.  And instead of reaching out to those around me, I've allowed my pride to well up inside and keep it to myself - which has built resentment towards people and this whole lifestyle change.  I have to say that I do truly believe this is something God has called me to, because it's been SUCH a battle.  So IF I come to you in a moment of weakness, PLEASE respect that this is something VERY VERY hard for me to admit, please pray for me that I'll be able to see where I'm being led and that I'll have the courage to do what I'm supposed to do!  Thanks!

Breakfast: cereal
Snack: yogurt
Lunch: roast, cucumbers, tomatoes, potatoes and pinto beans
Snack: yogurt
Dinner: squash/zuchini beef spaghetti sauce