Breakfast: oats with Protein powder and PB
Snack: missed
Lunch: potato salad with cucumbers and peas and chicken
Snack:missed
Dinner: BBQ and a sliver of apple and lemon pie at church
(Connie walked up to me with a look as if to say "what do you think you're doing?") No explanation needed, I dumped out everything I was doing. Every conversation I think I've had today, and all the chatter about my blog laying it all on the line. I'm not going to cover up anything that I do. I need to get my head back in the game, and yet I feel as if it's over. Tonight my hubby and I walked the church parking lot, and then we played basketball. It was nice just to feel like he was involved in something with me. I hate feeling like I'm all alone in this. And even when I want to give up, I have people who refuse to give up on me. I really don't get that. I'm not the type of person to fight for a relationship or friendship so this whole deal is foreign to me. So, when I keep trying to walk away from it all, Nikki keeps telling me shake it off and get back to it, and other people telling me that I have to keep going. All I can keep asking is WHY? This has NOT been as easy as I thought. I know nothing comes without hard work and sacrifice, but I feel like I've given up a lot, and maybe it's because I'm looking in the "rear-view mirror" so to say, but I MISS a lot of what I felt defined "who" I am. Now, I just feel like "who am I"?
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